


When I'm Up (I Can't Get Down)

by spockandawe



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Companionable Snark, Established Relationship, F/M, Flushed Romance | Matesprits, Pesterlog, Sexual Roleplay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-29
Updated: 2015-03-29
Packaged: 2018-03-20 07:07:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3641235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spockandawe/pseuds/spockandawe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><b>AC:</b> :33 < *ac wanders over to her furrends hive and carefully places a purresent of a freshly killed cluckbeast on the ground*<br/><b>AC</b>: :33 < *she scratches tentatively at his door and asks if dave is home*<br/><b>AC:</b> :33 < *she thinks that if he isnt she can find other ways to spend her evening but that it would be much more fun to spend it together*<br/><b>TG:</b> *dave types sup on his keyboard*<br/><b>AC:</b> :33 < booo thats cheating!!!<br/><b>TG:</b> *dave types how is this cheating on his keyboard*<br/><b>TG:</b> oh wait<br/><b>TG:</b> *akwete purrmusk types how is this cheating on his keyboard*<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	When I'm Up (I Can't Get Down)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [rosywing](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosywing/gifts).



arsenicCatnip [AC] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG]  
  
AC: :33 < *ac wanders over to her furrends hive and carefully places a purresent of a freshly killed cluckbeast on the ground*  
AC: :33 < *she scratches tentatively at his door and asks if dave is home*  
AC: :33 < *she thinks that if he isnt she can find other ways to spend her evening but that it would be much more fun to spend it together*  
TG: *dave types sup on his keyboard*  
AC: :33 < booo thats cheating!!!  
TG: *dave types how is this cheating on his keyboard*  
TG: oh wait  
TG: *akwete purrmusk types how is this cheating on his keyboard*  
AC: :33 < well i dont f33l like doing silly meta roleplay  
AC: :33 < its boring when you can do efurrything a person can do  
TG: i could roleplay as an exotic alien come to romance the fiercest most beautiful cat this planet has ever seen  
AC: :33 < youre going to roleplay a human  
TG: id be a human  
TG: oh  
TG: gdi  
AC: :33 < *ac grooms her paws in satisfaction*  
AC: :33 < *she knows the silly alien will nefur be able to k33p up with her*  
AC: :33 < *but its good for him to f33l like he has a chance*  
TG: hey now  
TG: harsh  
TG: watch out or ill take my toys and go home to cry the pain away  
AC: :33 < or you can just cry at your computer!  
AC: :33 < *tears drip onto daves fingers as he types sup*  
TG: ooh yeah baby thats the way i like it  
TG: crush that self esteem  
TG: crush it harder  
TG: put those eight inch spike heels on your little cat paws and just stomp all over my ego  
AC: :33 < you know you like it!!!  
AC: :33 < *dave totally swoons in admiration of the fearsome feline*  
TG: hey not fair you cant roleplay all my parts  
TG: *dave reaches through the computer screen and pinches nepetas grubscars*  
AC: :33 < *ac chooses to be as meta as dave and laughs off his pitiful attempt to transcend the physical bounds of roleplay*  
AC: :33 < besides if you didnt like it you wouldnt be playing along!  
AC: :33 < just look at you participating  
AC: :33 < its absolutely purrecious  
TG: aw yeah you like that  
TG: *dave takes off his shirt and flexes for the computer screen*  
TG: thats right babe I earned these muscles roleplaying  
AC: :33 < *ac purrs in appreciation*  
AC: :33 < you should!!!  
TG: i should what  
TG: i should roleplay  
TG: because in case you havent noticed i have been doing exactly that thing  
TG: i am a lean mean roleplaying machine  
TG: this gun show wouldnt be happening if I wasnt roleplaying  
AC: :33 < no, dumbass  
AC: :33 < i mean you should take off your shirt!  
TG: what  
TG: oh  
TG: really  
AC: :// < no i meant that in an entirely sarcastic way and i would nefur want to s33 you with your shirt off efur  
AC: :33 < what do you think???  
TG: but like  
TG: you arent going to see me  
TG: you do realize that right  
TG: just want to be sure were on the same page here  
TG: regardless of possible past remarks anyone might have made along the lines of somebody pinching somebody elses grubscars through their computer  
TG: thats in the past baby lets look forward to the future  
AC: :33 < dave  
AC: :33 < daaaaaave  
AC: :(( < are you telling me no???  
TG: hey now  
AC: :(( < *ac runs away sobbing*  
AC: :(( < *she curls up in a corner to cry tears of unfathomable sadness*  
TG: whoa there  
TG: hold your horses  
AC: :(( < *ac has never known the pain of rejection like this!*  
AC: :(( < *as she sobs quietly into her hands she thinks that she might nefur recover from this expurrience*  
TG: ok ngl im kind of curious to see how long you can make this last  
TG: but  
AC: :(( < *ac looks up from her hands and scrubs a few stray tears away from her ch33ks*  
AC: :(( < *she sniffles once and makes a questioning noise beclaws she doesnt quite trust her voice*  
TG: wow really laying on the theatrics there  
TG: and the guilt  
TG: truly impressive amounts of guilt  
TG: tragically your efforts are wasted on me  
AC: :(( < *ac sniffles again but in a way that indicates she may burst into tears again at any moment*  
TG: BECAUSE i took off my shirt right when you asked me to  
AC: :33 < awww but i was having so much fun with the guilt!  
AC: :(( < dave why must you take everything i enjoy away from me???  
TG: oh my god there is no way for me to win  
TG: i didnt take off my shirt and thats wrong  
TG: i did take off my shirt and thats wrong too  
TG: i have fathomed your unfathomable sadness  
TG: its what im experiencing right here and its all your fault  
TG: hold on let me type up a melodramatic description of the way I scrub tears from my ch33ks its only fair  
AC: :33 < dave stop being such a drama qu33n  
TG: me  
TG: im the drama queen  
AC: :33 < im glad you agr33!  
AC: :33 < as punishment for being so n33dy  
AC: :33 < youuuu shouuuuuld  
TG: i should  
AC: >:33 < take off your pants!!!  
TG: whoa now  
TG: moving so fast  
TG: consider my maidens honor over here  
TG: im a delicate flower you have to romance me all tenderly  
TG: shit now im over here feeling downright ravaged  
TG: is that how you want me to feel  
TG: ravaged  
AC: :33 < …  
AC: :33 < yes  
TG: ok i walked into that one  
TG: but consider my poor feelings  
TG: im a tender soul  
TG: you have to woo me with flowers and chocolates  
AC: :33 < *ac dumps a stupidly huge pile of flowers and chocolate at daves f33t*  
AC: :33 < oh would you just look at that  
AC: :33 < its a twelfth perig33s eve miracle  
AC: :33 < now you should take off your pants  
TG: *dave totally takes off his pants*  
TG: *his nudity is just as real as your flowers and chocolate*  
AC: :33 < lame!!!  
TG: you know whats lame  
TG: flowers and chocolate made of lies  
TG: thats whats really lame here  
AC: :(( < boo unfair i cant get you purresents across a chat client!  
AC: :33 < but you can totally get naked across a chat client  
AC: :33 < dave  
AC: :33 < daaave!  
AC: >:DD < do it!  
AC: >:DD < you should do it!  
AC: :(( < fur me?  
AC: :33 < purrlease???  
TG: purrlease  
TG: oops thats it my boner is pre dead i have discovered the antiviagra  
AC: :33 < ill stop saying purrlease if you take off your pants for me!  
AC: :33 < but if you choose to resist that pun may enter my vocabulary…  
AC: >:DD < PURRMANENTLY  
TG: ok jfc i give up i surrender  
TG: i am hoisting the white flag  
TG: the white flag is my underwear  
TG: its all very symbolic and beautiful just imagine me posing with my underwear flag in front of the setting sun and you will have some idea of just how magnificent this scene is  
AC: :33 < yesss all according to plan  
TG: according to plan huh  
TG: but did you really think there was the slightest possibility you could affect the outcome  
TG: i took off my pants 35 minutes ago  
AC: :33 < …  
AC: :33 < what  
TG: its a reference  
AC: :33 < really  
TG: no seriously this is a thing  
TG: i stg  
AC: :33 < are you telling me youve been sitting around in just your shirt for 35 minutes  
AC: :33 < with your weird human bulge dangling out below  
AC: :33 < just  
AC: :33 < hanging there  
AC: :33 < swinging in the br33ze  
TG: that is not what i meant and you know it  
AC: :33 < huh  
AC: :33 < would you look at that  
TG: what now  
AC: :(( < my bulge has retracted into my body so far that it may nefur emerge again  
TG: cute  
TG: real cute  
AC: :33 < whats REALLY cute is when you let your mouth run away from you and dont think through what youre saying!!!  
AC: :33 < i think i n33d to draw a picture of that  
TG: wow  
AC: :33 < ill use it to k33p me company on cold nights  
AC: :33 < just dave  
AC: :33 < and his shirt  
AC: :33 < and nothing else  
TG: how about not  
AC: :33 < oh wait!  
AC: :33 < socks too!!!  
AC: :33 < and daves dangly bits  
AC: :DD < i wonder if i could get kanaya to make me a pillow  
TG: ok yes thank you can we please change the subject now i think i have been sufficiently put in my place for one evening  
TG: i have fond dreams of maybe one day catching a goddamn break  
TG: such dreams i have  
TG: will they ever come true  
TG: probably not but a guy can hope  
AC: :33 < youd be bored if i nefur teased you!  
TG: gosh it sure would be nice if i knew  
TG: but as it happens ive never had the opportunity to find out  
TG: this has been my life from day one  
TG: shit i dont think id recognize sincerity at this point if it hit me in the goddamn face  
AC: :33 < sure you would!  
AC: >:DD < fur example, i sincerely want to s33 you naked  
TG: wow sure is unlucky for you that you decided to kick this off over the internet  
TG: i took off my clothes for nothing  
TG: if only you decided to take advantage of me in person  
TG: just think of the sights you could be seeing  
AC: :33 < lucky for me i have an excellent imagination!!!  
TG: oh then  
TG: uh  
TG: what are you imagining  
AC: :33 < im imagining dave  
TG: wow sure didnt see that one coming  
TG: were breaking new and exciting ground here  
AC: :33 < hush!!!  
AC: :33 < if youd just roleplay nicely this would be much easier  
AC: :33 < but it looks like we have to do this…  
AC: >:DD < the HARD way  
AC: :33 < h33 h33 and NOW i imagine dave is blushing  
AC: :33 < youll have to tell me how well im imagining things since i cant s33 for myself!  
TG: um  
TG: sure yeah i guess youre pretty good at imagining  
AC: :33 < good!  
AC: :33 < now if i was there in purrson id want to get my hands on you!  
TG: you sure are all about those cuddles  
TG: introducing me to the joys of being the little spoon all day erryday  
AC: :33 < you love being the little spoon dont even try to purrtend!  
TG: i think whatever i feel about being the little spoon is irrelevant next to your love for being the big spoon  
AC: :33 < fair enough!!!  
AC: :33 < but dave  
AC: >:DD < i wasnt talking about cuddles i was talking about touching you  
TG: oh  
TG: uh  
AC: :33 < is there a purroblem?  
AC: :33 < you sound a little nervous  
AC: :33 < maybe even flustered!  
TG: no i  
AC: :33 < but im not there to touch you myself!  
AC: :33 < its really very sad  
AC: >:33 < i guess youll just have to touch yourself for me!!!  
TG: sfdsa  
AC: :33 < is something wrong?  
TG: *ac asks with a deceptively innocent smile*  
TG: you do realize  
TG: that sounds  
TG: kind of  
AC: :OO < why dave!!!  
AC: :OO < i am pawsitively shocked that youd assume i meant anything depurraved!  
TG: yeah deceptively innocent was right  
TG: just how depurraved are we talking here  
TG: the sexy train has jumped the rails im the poor passenger whos just along for the ride  
TG: clue me in to how depurraved youre aiming for  
AC: :33 < why i can only say its as depurraved as you think it is  
AC: >:33 < also I believe this is my cue to add more cat puns to the confursation  
TG: definitely no to that last thing  
TG: and you know what  
TG: if youre giving me creative control here  
TG: *dave raises his hand to his cheek in a gentle pap*  
AC: :OO < !!!!!!  
AC: :OO < filthy!!!  
TG: you asked for it  
AC: :33 < WELL  
AC: :33 < *ac imagines that maybe she runs a hand down daves thorax*  
AC: :33 < *gentle but sharp enough to let him feel the tips of her claws*  
AC: :33 < *beclaws she KNOWS dave likes that*  
AC: :33 < *it makes him shiver when she touches him like that*  
AC: :33 < purrhaps dave should touch himself in similar ways to really immerse himself in the experience hmm?  
AC: :33 < WINK WINK  
AC: :33 < *she leans in ofur his lap, resting her hands on his thighs and pinning him to his chair*  
AC: :33 < *when he shifts she can feel the muscles in his legs move but he wont be able to get fr33 until she lets him*  
TG: well  
TG: shit  
TG: i  
TG: i cant argue with that  
AC: :33 < and I dont just touch you!  
AC: :33 < i like kisses you definitely cant furget those  
AC: :33 < but!!!  
AC: :33 < *ac doesnt want to do anything dave doesnt like*  
AC: :33 < *so if he wants kisses from ac...*  
AC: >:33 < *hes going to have to ask for them*  
TG: what  
AC: :33 < *ac stays right where she is*  
AC: :33 < *dave still cant move but shes not going any further until he asks for it*  
TG: seriously  
AC: :(( < *the silence stretches on and ac begins to wonder if purrhaps dave doesnt WANT to kiss her*  
TG: subtle as a brick to the face  
TG: ok  
TG: fine  
TG: will you please imagine that youre kissing me  
AC: :33 < *ac laughs and leans in to kiss dave right on the lips!*  
AC: :33 < *she stays where she is balanced on his legs so she can kiss him ofur and ofur and ofur*  
TG: am i supposed to kiss myself here too  
TG: for that immersive imagination experience  
AC: :33 < i declare it to be so!  
AC: :33 < you must make out with your hand any time i imagine us kissing  
TG: oh my god seriously  
TG: no  
AC: :(( < you dont want to imagine im kissing you?  
TG: nope no imaginary kisses are all well and good but making out with my hand is where I draw the line  
AC: :(( < *acs eyes well up with tears*  
TG: you can make sad faces all you want but it wont help you  
TG: you cant manipulate me into literally frenching my own hand  
TG: im sorry to dash your strange strange dreams but life is full of disappointments for us all  
AC: :33 < *ac decides she will simply have to kiss dave THR33 times as much to make up for the tragic lack of immersion!*  
AC: :33 < *she gets a handful of his hair and tugs nice and hard to make him tilt his head up for her*  
AC: :33 < *dave parts his lips for her because hed nefur even THINK of saying no to ac when she wanted something*  
AC: :33 < *she smiles against his mouth while she kisses him because he always feels so nice and warm against her*  
AC: :33 < *and the noises he makes are beyond purrfect!*  
AC: :33 < *once ac starts nibbling on his lips dave cant keep quiet no matter how hard he tries*  
AC: :33 < *and all the little sounds get swallowed up in her mouth because she just cant bring herself to pull away from him*  
AC: :33 < *ac wonders to herself in dave is enjoying this as much as she is*  
AC: :33 < *meaningful pause*  
TG: wait shit is that me  
TG: this  
TG: i think i can say i am interested in this scenario yes  
AC: :33 < *ac supposes that will do fur now!*  
AC: :33 < *ac pulls away from the kiss and drops her mouth to daves neck*  
AC: :33 < *she bites his neck gently but still enough for him to f33l her fangs*  
AC: :33 < *and she growls to let efurryone know that he is HERS*  
AC: :33 < *how does dave react to that, she wonders*  
AC: :33 < *purrhaps he turns bright red, or purrhaps he makes another one of those funny noises*  
AC: :33 < ???  
TG: oh  
TG: dave  
TG: *dave blushes hard as shit which you already know because thats what dave always fucking does*  
TG: *there is no reason to make dave actually type it out*  
AC: :33 < yes there is!  
AC: :33 < beclaws it makes me happy!  
AC: :33 < *ac only wants to know that dave is having as much of a good time as she is*  
AC: >:33 < *she pulls back a little and stands up but k33ps leaning on daves legs to be sure he knows there is no escape!*  
AC: :33 < *blushing the tiniest bit olive, ac takes a shy p33k down at daves bulge to s33 how it is doing*  
TG: shy yes that is definitely a word i would use to describe you  
TG: daves bulge is  
TG: also interested in the proceedings  
AC: :33 < aww you can do better than that!  
TG: seriously  
AC: :33 < purrticipation is important!  
TG: ok  
TG: fine  
TG: ok  
TG: daves bulge wishes you were here just as much as dave does  
TG: daves bulge has been wishing that since you told him to take off his shirt  
TG: dave wonders if hes allowed to touch little dave  
TG: but his hands have been a little busy doing shit like pulling his hair and trying to lean on his own thighs  
AC: :(( < but dave hasnt been making out with his hand  
TG: absolutely not  
AC: :33 < *ac thinks to herself that dave is the cutest thing  shes ever s33n!*  
AC: :33 < *she could just keep teasing him forefur and efur*  
AC: :33 < *but she has to wonder what dave wants her to do next*  
TG: fuck no dont keep teasing  
TG: dave wants you to touch his dick  
AC: :33 < what does dave say when he wants ac do do something?  
TG: agh seriously  
TG: please touch my dick  
TG: i am literally going to die if you dont touch my dick soon  
TG: my dick will stage a rebellion and secede from my body if i dont get some physical contact up in this joint  
AC: :33 < *ac ponders whether or not she wants to go along with this*  
AC: :33 < *she takes a nice long look down at daves face and grins beclaws even if he asks nice she doesnt have to do anything if she decides he n33ds to be teased more*  
AC: >:33 < *why she could k33p him here for hours without touching him the way he wants*  
AC: :33 < *and she knows dave wouldnt touch himself either no matter how desperate he was*  
AC: :33 < *dave always knows how to listen to what ac wants doesnt he*  
TG: fuck  
TG: nepeta  
AC: :33 < *but ac decides she will be merciful!*  
AC: :33 < *she runs one finger up daves bulge*  
AC: :33 < *she doesnt use her claws here, only her fingertips*  
AC: :33 < *and she touches him so gently he can barely even f33l it*  
AC: :33 < *she wishes she could know how dave likes that*  
AC: :33 < *if he doesnt like it she can stop right away*  
TG: its good its good  
TG: fuck please dont stop  
TG: you dont have to be gentle my dick is strong like bull i can take more  
AC: >:33 < *ac grins wickedly!*  
AC: :33 < *she likes touching dave a lot but she cant help but think that dave hasnt touched HER yet!*  
AC: :(( < *purrhaps dave just doesnt want to touch her*  
TG: fuck dont you try to pull this shit  
TG: you know that if you were here right now i wouldnt be able to keep my hands off you  
TG: youre still dressed right  
TG: you didnt rp taking off any clothes so sure lets go with that  
TG: i bet if i reached down your pants right now id get a big dripping handful of bulge  
TG: why miss nepeta how scandalous  
TG: and oh would you just look at how empty that nook is  
TG: shits downright tragic  
TG: if only youd decided to make a trip to daves house instead of doing this by chat then maybe youd have something to fill yourself with  
TG: that silly human with his clawless fingers and his eminently fuckable dick  
TG: maybe he is good for something after all  
\-- arsenicCatnip [AC] sent turntechGodhead [TG] the file “myartificialhumanbulge.png” --  
AC: :DD < go on  
TG: well  
TG: shit  
AC: :33 < *as her silly human s33ms at a loss for words ac again seizes the initiative!*  
AC: :33 < *she must concede that purrhaps certain speculations about her current state were accurate*  
AC: :33 < *but she is confident that she is having a similar effect on dave!*  
AC: :33 < *ac takes his bulge in hand more firmly, and brushes her thumb right across the top to make him jump*  
AC: :33 < *she wonders if hes dripping genetic material yet*  
TG: fuck  
TG: yes ok im dripping and you continue to find that as strangely appealing as ever  
TG: dave is pretty sure nepeta wishes she could be getting some of that choice genetic material up her seedflap right now  
AC: :33 < purrhaps!  
AC: :33 < *ac supposes she will have to make do with her imagination and a nice big sex toy*  
AC: :33 < *with her other hand ac reaches down to play with daves funny shame globes*  
AC: ;33 < *she rolls them carefully between her fingers and lets her claws just barely brush against his skin*  
AC: :33 < *daves hips try to jerk into her hands but ac just moves with him and it does him no good!*  
AC: :33 < *ac is the one touching dave right now and nothing will happen befur she decides she wants it to happen*  
AC: :33 < *she growls at dave to warn him not to do that again*  
AC: :33 < *purrsumably dave is touching ac at the same time*  
TG: fuck  
TG: shit  
TG: ok i only have so many hands here  
TG: yeah dave has a hand right between her legs  
TG: getting all friendly with her nook while her bulge wraps around his wrist  
TG: and because some of us are considerate enough not to order the other one to hold totally still  
TG: nepetas grinding down on daves hand like theres no tomorrow  
TG: and you know what dave thinks hes going to let her do all the work here too  
TG: shes taken his hand prisoner and that hand is languishing in captivity and if she wants to get off shes going to have to saddle up and ride that hand off into the sunset  
TG: roll credits while nepeta fills a bucket in the background and stains daves hand permanently green  
AC: :33 < quite an acceptable scenario!  
AC: :(( < but  
TG: but  
AC: :(( < *ac blushes in mortification to realize there isnt a single bucket in sight!*  
AC: :(( < *and shes so close to spilling that shed nefur be able to find one in time*  
AC: :(( < *what in the world will she do???*  
TG: well shit  
TG: i guess  
TG: fuck then i guess that means ill have to be your bucket  
AC: :OO < *ac blushes bright gr33n*  
AC: :OO < how depurraved!  
TG: yeah yeah you definitely werent angling for this from the start ok  
AC: :33 < *ac is so close to spilling she doesnt even know what to do*  
AC: :33 < *shes so desperate for release but she cant spill her material on the floor she just cant*  
AC: :33 < *what does dave do?*  
TG: dave gets on his knees for her  
TG: he pulls her right over his face and gets his hands on her ass and kneads like hes the royal baker making a loaf of bread for the king  
TG: his whole career is riding on how he applies his hands to that butt  
TG: no asscheeks have ever been so goddamn kneaded  
AC: :33 < *acs bulge presses tentatively at daves lips*  
TG: well fuck how can i say no to that  
TG: dave opens his mouth and sets up a welcome banner to invite that bulge right on in  
AC: :33 < what is it like?  
TG: shit  
TG: its perfect  
TG: i can barely breathe around you and thats just the way I like it  
TG: if you rode my face like this long enough i bet id get off on just that  
TG: you stretch me out so good makes my jaw fucking ache  
TG: im so read yfor you to paint me green  
TG: goddamn  
TG: wish icould see the faces youre making right now  
TG: specially when i get a hadn between your legs to tease your nook  
TG: i wnoder if i could even get a finger inside you before yuo go off like a rocket  
TG: i bet youre too closeto the edge to even hold out that long  
TG: i  
TG: fuck  
TG: nepeta  
AC: :33 < im here!!!  
AC: :33 < *ac backs away from daves mouth and her bulge slips out from between his lips*  
AC: :33 < *she takes a moment to admire how purretty he looks all covered in her color like this*  
AC: :33 < *her hands are still shaking but she does her best to smooth his hair down and tilts his head up so she can bend down and kiss him*  
AC: :33 < *after he made her f33l so purrfect she wants to make him f33l just as good*  
AC: :33 < *she wonders what the best way is to do that*  
TG: i  
AC: :33 < hush!  
AC: :33 < that was a rhetorical wondering  
AC: :33 < *after one last kiss ac carefully tips dave onto his back on the floor*  
AC: :33 < *she kn33ls down between his legs and grins up at him, showing all her fangs*  
AC: :33 < *she bends down towards his bulge*  
AC: :33 < *so slowly*  
AC: >:33 < *so slowly he has to wonder if shell efur touch him*  
TG: god  
TG: please  
TG: i cnat  
AC: :33 < *ac decides she will be merciful!*  
AC: :33 < *she wraps her lips around him and takes him in all at once*  
AC: :33 < *she pins his hands to the floor so that dave is helpless to do anything*  
AC: :33 < *and then she begins to move*  
AC: :33 < *ac can just m33t his eyes if she looks up at him*  
AC: :33 < *hes blushing red all the way out to his shoulders and he doesnt even realize hes biting his lip as he watches her*  
AC: :33 < *hes begging her to go faster but he can hardly even put a sentence together*  
AC: :33 < *its absolutely purrecious the way he trips over his words when she gets him like this*  
AC: :33 < *ac can feel his legs shaking and she can hear him gasping for air and hes dripping genetic material inside her mouth*  
AC: :33 < *she wonders how long he can hold out*  
AC: :33 < *but she already knows the answer is not long!*  
AC: :33 < *if her mouth wasnt already busy shed be telling him how easy he is*  
AC: :33 < *and how desperate he is for her*  
AC: >:33 < *if she wanted to she could make him stop what hes doing right now and beg for more!*  
AC: :33 < *but she will be kind*  
AC: :33 < *instead she pulls away just long enough to tell him to come for her*  
AC: :33 < *and puts her mouth back on his bulge*  
AC: :33 < *when he comes he arches his back so hard he lifts her right off the ground*  
AC: :33 < *she can taste his genetic material and keeps her mouth on him to be sure she catches efurry last drop*  
AC: :33 < *she doesnt take her mouth away until hes done and hes started weakly trying to push her away*  
AC: :33 < which is purrsumably the point that hes at now?  
AC: :33 < dave?  
TG: fuck  
TG: yeah  
TG: im here  
TG: and purrsumably at that point yes  
TG: just  
TG: god  
AC: :33 < h33 h33!  
AC: :33 < youre the cutest when youre all overwhelmed!  
AC: :33 < i f33l like we should do this again  
TG: what now  
TG: thanks but no thanks i think my dick might fall off  
AC: :(( < boooooo  
TG: have you ever known what its like to have a chafed bulge  
TG: if not you dont get to mock my pain  
TG: also refractory periods  
TG: those are a thing  
AC: :33 < yes that has been accounted for  
AC: :33 < i figure that will be the time you waste being a difficult asshole  
TG: ouch  
TG: harsh  
AC: :33 < dont be a wiggler!  
AC: :33 < hey hey you know whats also a good refractory period  
TG: what  
AC: :33 < the time it takes me to walk from my hive to yours  
TG: oh  
TG: really  
AC: :33 < iiis that a purroblem?  
TG: oh what no  
TG: im just trying to figure out what kind of epic seduction scene i can stage in twenty minutes  
TG: I can handle setting out some sexy candles and all that jazz  
TG: but this is too short notice to hire a band to serenade you from outside my window  
TG: shit I dont think ill even be able to outsource bathing your feet in the finest perfumes  
TG: i guess ill have to get my hands dirty myself  
TG: looks like im not keeping you in the luxury that you deserve  
AC: :33 < purrobably we shouldnt do candles anymore after last time  
TG: fair enough i sometimes think i can still smell the smoke  
AC: :(( < and perfumes make me sn33ze  
TG: oh shit really  
TG: ok then youve gotta help me out here what kind of scene am i going to lay out  
AC: :33 < hmm  
AC: :33 < oh i know!  
AC: :DD < lingerie!!!  
TG: lingerie  
AC: :33 < yeah yeah remember that red lacy set from your last wriggling day?  
TG: wait  
TG: oh  
TG: oh fuck yes  
TG: ok youve got it your wish is my command im off to get dressed right now ill be ready and waiting by the time you get over here  
AC: :33 < yesss!  
AC: :33 < i cant wait to s33 you  
AC: >:33 < brace yourself!  
  
arsenicCatnip [AC] ceased trolling turntechGodhead [TG]  


**Author's Note:**

> [Tumblr](http://spockandawe.tumblr.com/post/115792808466/when-im-up-i-cant-get-down-spockandawe)


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